Not Your fault
by AT Fan
Summary: Sam and Vala go out for a night on the town after the events of AOT. They discover some truths about each other. S/J pairing and mention of D/V Sam/Vala friendship


Not Your Fault

Vala decides to give Sam a push in the right direction. Sam calls Vala on some of her behavior and a heart to heart ensues. Sam decides Vala may not be Janet but she is still a good friend.

Sam/Vala friendship and S/J of course

Disclaimer: Not mine but a girl can wish right? Belongs to MGM and Sci-Fi NBC and Gekko

Set after AOT but before Continuum spoilers up to and including season four Atlantis

"Come on Sam, you promised".

Sam tried glaring at her but she was pouting and she was right she had promised of course at the time she never dreamed that they actually would defeat the Ori so it seemed like it was pretty safe. "I promise after the Ori are no longer threatening Earth we will both go out clubbing" Ugh, it was times like this that she hated Vala's petchulance for remembering things.

Okay, well going to a club was bad enough now Vala actually wanted to have her wear club clothes as in, revealing and very short. Oh well, it could be worse at least you know who wouldn't be seeing her in this outfit, she would never live it down. It was official, Vala was evil.

"I just want to take a picture; your tough solider side isn't embarrassed is it?" Hopefully she wouldn't be showing it to Cameron or Daniel anytime soon.

"Vala, of course not," and she painted on a fake smile and pretended not to care that the picture could ruin her life.

"Yep definitely evil", she thought to herself.

As if the outfit way too short and did I mention tight, wasn't bad enough, Vala also saw fit to do her makeup because as she put it, "You have to look different than you do on base I mean really Sam, don't you even read Vogue or Cosmo".

Sam really didn't want to know how Vala knew about Vogue or Cosmo but she suspected the television or the internet was to blame.

For the first time since deciding to grow out her hair Sam was also questioning that decision seeing as how that was next on Vala's to do list.

"The ponytail thing is fine for work but you need to wear it down and properly styled for a night on the town darling."

Evidently that was rule number two for going out on the town according to Cosmo's day to evening transformation guide. Oh well she was determined to make the best of it and reluctantly surmised that it did look pretty nice once Vala got done playing with it. Of course with all the styling products involved she doubted it would move on its own.

The makeup was a little bit heavy for her tastes but appropriate for a club.

"All done; now we can go have some fun and find lots of unsuspecting men to buy us drinks doesn't that sound like fun?"

Not really sure if Vala wanted her to answer or not, Sam mumbled a "yeah sure I guess so."

The club was noisy but the music was good and soon Sam found herself enjoying dancing even though the guy wasn't her type and she wasn't remotely interested it was nice to just be able to dance. Vala was dancing next to her and she noticed how provocatively she moved and swayed to the music.

Sam found herself wishing sometimes that she could be so free and uninhibited. The lights and music were almost overwhelming and both of them were soon feeling the effects of their earlier jello shots.

" Mind if we find someplace quieter ?"

"No, it is getting a bit too much maybe we go outside for a bit there were some tables on the deck outside."

They managed to lose their respective dance partners and made their way outside. It was early summer in Colorado and the cool evening air felt nice after the hot environment of the club.

"Are you having fun Sam?"

Actually I was, surprised that Vala wasn't flirting over the top or embarrassing herself or me.

I answered truthfully, "Yes I am. I am glad I came with you"

"Well, you did promise" she reminded me

"True but I am having fun and you..."

"That's an act you know, I don't really… I mean well after Quetesh I haven't really it sometimes just easier to pretend you know but sometimes I wish…"

"Oh, clearly that alcohol is affecting me I didn't mean to get so serious well, let's get back inside."

Vala, no wait it's okay, what did you mean it's all an act, what about when someone really does care couldn't you care for them as well?"

" I don't know Sam I always had to… it was necessary, not much choice ,always better not to let myself care, can't get hurt, just easier not to feel."

Sam felt a wave of emotion wash over her knowing the alcohol may be partly to blame but secretly glad that she was able to let Vala confide in her. A tendril of emotion not belonging to her clung to her words, she knew Jolinar had felt the same thing had the same mindset during Binar which she really really tried never to think about. She guessed Vala during the whole Quetesh thing felt the same shut off emotions can't do anything; helpless to stop it just easier to not feel. Oh God now she understood. The whole over the top sexual act, the flirting, innuendos, all of it was just an act; needing protection from how she was really feeling.

Deep down Sam knew Vala was capable of caring and loving someone her actions proved it, she just couldn't believe Vala didn't realize it.

Not stopping to think what she was saying Sam blurted out, "Daniel then, why all the teasing?"

"You like him don't you, for real, not pretend".

Vala's normal cheery face took on an almost fearful image her eyes downcast in a pained expression.

"He won't hurt you"

"I can't take that chance".

Anyway, you, me, we are the same; you are afraid as well. You may not pretend like I do but the fear is there, what made you afraid, was it Jolinar her memories or something else?"

TBC


End file.
